The biggest trait people respect in others is genuineness. It’s hard to find these days because we’re so busy trying to be something else. Authenticity is a quality we all want to be around, but after years of building masks, how can we find courage to let them all go?

I’ve learned countless of lessons in my life, all of which have helped me know more about myself. Sometimes there are things we can’t control in this world, but if there’s one thing we all have power of, it’s our character. Once we have control of that, everything else magically falls in place – after all, if you’re your authentic self, you have no competition.

In this post, I will cover the steps needed to achieve the elements that will enable you to be your authentic self and still live the life you want:

Listen Only to Yourself

Genuineness is recognised when you live as the unique person you’re meant to be. In order to find this unique person, you need to stop listening to the world and everyone around you. Your parents, your friends, your teachers, your students, your siblings, strangers or loved ones, can’t ever speak for you nor should you ever allow them to think for you.

The only voice, intuition or consciousness you should obey is your own. That’s the only way to achieve your destiny. Your authenticity becomes more palatable when you listen to your gut. You become comfortable in your own skin. You think, “Yes, that’s the person I want to go to bed with.” You live as you’re meant to be – it’s a high so powerful that once you’re up there, you never want to come down.

Stop Lying to the World

Genuine is truth. It’s time to detox yourself of every lie you’ve told. Think back and back and back to the very first white lie that jumpstarted a path of others – own it, and swear to yourself that you will never to do it again.

You don’t need to pretend to be someone you’re not in order for people to like or respect you. Trust me when I say they like and respect a person who tells the truth rather than a person who feels he needs to brag, exaggerate or make up tales to gain validity.

When you lie, you unconsciously tell yourself you are not good enough as you actually are – this message is spread to the rest of your subliminal mind, making it hard to reverse. Every lie trains your brain to think you’re inadequate. Break the habit and feel the power gained from your personal truth.

Tap Into Your Inner Child

Inside us all, there is a child who never grew up. Just because we’re adults doesn’t mean our spirit has changed. It only means we’ve learned to adapt independently, to manage our practical and emotional lives in a mature way. But deep down, we’re still a child with an imagination the size of the moon and with incredible amounts of love to give – try and remember what it felt like.

Not only should you tap into your own inner child, but you should also try to inspire others to do the same. When a person intimidates you, envision them as a child; that’s the boy or girl you need to connect with. We’re all so busy trying to be grownups – but let’s face it; we pretty much make it up as we go along anyway. Make the world smile by reminding us that in spite of adult problems, there is always room for magic.

Never Love Blindly

Everyone wants to be loved. So much so that when they see a pure heart, they want to grab it and use it. In many ways, love is a currency that can be traded carelessly. Don’t be afraid to love the world and all the people in it.

When you love, love fiercely and with every fiber of your being. But know how valuable it is. Never give it away for free because at its very core, love is coveted by the greedy.

Don’t be afraid to love strangers or to give love and respect, but be strong enough to know what it truly looks like: Love feels good. It isn’t manipulated, uncomfortable or used for blackmail or credit. It’s real, and when done correctly, lights up the saddest of faces.

Be Grateful for Goodness

There is good all around us but as we are all to aware, everyone has bad qualities about them too (we can’t help it), but at our core we are good – we discovered the power of community long ago. It’s how we’ve gotten to where we are: by being here for each other and spreading positivity from one heart to another.

Somewhere on humanity‘s long road we have become jaded, we no longer see goodness even when it’s staring us right in the face. If we drop the suspicion, we are able to see and experience a genuine spark even if it is rare – be grateful when it happens, recognise it then close your eyes and retain its goodness so you can tap into it when you need to remember what goodness feels like.

Give People a Chance

People know when you aren’t there with them, they know when you’re judging them and when you feel uncomfortable or nervous around them especially when you’re being fake, or you’re hiding something. At the end of the day, a genuine spirit is one who doesn’t rely on assumptions to create opinions. Instead, he or she relies on experiences to paint a picture of you in their mind.

When someone shows you who they are, believe them (thanks David). Don’t take someone’s gossip as truth – think for yourself. Give people a chance to show you who they really are without getting interrupted by mean girl thoughts. Let them teach you how to think of them.

Look Down to No One

Keep your head high because you are a clean slate. The world is not your boss, quite the contrary; you are the boss of the world.

Whether it’s your superior, your parents, or a friend, no one has the right to try and take or be given your power. That is forever yours to keep and hold. Never make any person treat you less than what you are.

There is no one in this world more important than you. Let me repeat: there is no one in this world more important than you. What I mean by that is to never become submissive for anyone. Look down to no one.

Live Inside Your Heart Every Single Day

At the end of our lives we are never judged by the amount of things we did, but by how much love we left behind, that’s our legacy. Leave trails of love wherever you go, not because you want to be liked, but because it’s an expression of who you are and how much you respect life.

You’re capable of loving in unfathomable quantities. Wade in it. Understand that when you wake up, you deserve to be whole. Nothing has ever come from holding hate in your heart; love heals all cracks and wounds. It’s an emotional balm that never fails.

Show Your True Colours

You know when you’re at your sharpest, you feel like you are on a roll whilst feeling incredibly comfortable; you never question what people are thinking because you know they like you – this is you at your prime.

We love these moments because it’s when our true colors are expressed – this is why people like you. It’s only when we stop ourselves from showing our true colours that the world stops too. Believe me, your colors will always shine as bright as your courage shines to show them.

Stop hiding. Stop filtering yourself to make people happy. Your brain is going to pick up this habit as self-pity and will soon start to play it with or without your permission. Rid yourself of the mask and relish in your truth.

Give Joy to Others

The greatest gift you can ever give someone isn’t something that can be bought; it is given freely from the soul. Joy is a fulfillment we’re all seeking, but most of us know where to look because the only way we find it is by bouncing it back and forth from each other – when you give joy, you henceforth receive it.

You give joy by not rocking the boat, not making people angry on purpose or delivering anything you know will make things difficult. Do your best at anything you do, make the best possible choices you can make from what you know thus far, and make sure people know how much you care. That’s when joy is born, as well as the duty to reciprocate it. Then it becomes a dance.

In Conclusion

There are many things we can’t control in this world, but if there’s one thing we do have the power to control – our character. Once we have a firm grasp of that, everything else will magically fall into place – after all, if you’re your authentic self, you have no competition.